


cause I need you now (but I don't know you yet)

by 88ray_ray88



Category: Runaways (Comics), Runaways (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Deanoru AU, Drama & Romance, F/F, F/M, The Half of It AU, based of the movie (which is a godsend), guest star carol danvers as awesome english teacher, more tags as i get into, will include other runaways later on
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-06-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 04:28:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24088915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/88ray_ray88/pseuds/88ray_ray88
Summary: this is not a love story (or is it).my take on the half of it but with deanoru
Relationships: Karolina Dean & Nico Minoru, Karolina Dean/Nico Minoru, Nico Minoru/Chase Stein (bromance), slight (very slight) Karolina Dean/Chase Stein
Comments: 14
Kudos: 66





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> warning ahead, there will be some spoilers from the movie. so please, if you haven’t watched the half of it yet, stop reading and go see the beauty that is that movie. If you have, please enjoy :)

_According to Greek mythology, humans were originally created with four arms, four legs, and one head with two faces. They were happy and complete. Fearing their power, Zeus cleaved them into two separate parts, condemning them to spend their lives wandering for their other halves._  
  
Nico rubs her eyes belligerently before skimming through the document, fixing any remaining errors she may have missed.   
  
“And that is the source of our desire to love one another. Love is born into every human being; it yearns for its return to our original nature together, completing the halves,” she whispers.   
  
A look of contempt washes over.   
  
That’ll have to do for now.   
  
Deep down, Nico knew Ms. Danvers would enjoy Plato, rewarding another A-minus or A, if she was feeling giving that evening.   
  
Not that she would care to admit that it mattered to her.   
  
It was only business.   
  
She quickly arises from her softly seated booth, the sound of her alarm blazing in the background. Swiftly, she changes into a school-appropriate outfit.   
  
Brushing through her checklist, she quickly writes the names of her peers before checking up on her father. She catches a glimpse of him passed out, snoring on the comforter. She moves around to place a blanket on him before slipping out.   
  
Maybe it was the weather becoming cooler, or maybe it was the all-nighter she attempted to pull to complete eight A-worth essays, but the ride to school was slightly more irritating than usual.   
  
“HEY IT’S MINI-ORUUUUU!” a voice screams from the back of a truck, speeding past her, nearly touching her and throwing her off her game. With one swift motion, she is on the ground.   
  
“Idiots,” she mutters under her breath.  
  
_Don’t let them get to you_ , she prompts herself, wiping the dirt off her jeans.   
  
She could get through this day.   
  
It was only high school. Very stagnant and repetitive. Keeping her head down, ignoring assholes, and just trying to make it through the day.   
  
That is if she could just make it past the first period. Music education with none other than Mr. Jonah Dean.   
  
When Nico arrived, Mr. Dean was already working through some notes with the other students.  
  
“Fantastic,” he sighs, “the angels weep with such joy at the sound. Next up…” he continues to talk, which is the perfect time for Nico to distribute the goods, as she liked to call it. Passing out the essays in the form of sheet music. 

Now that was absolutely brilliant. Maybe even symbolic, or so she would think.   
  
Nico’s eyes peer the room until it reaches one with golden blonde locks and piercing blue eyes. Her eyes strapped down onto her sheet music, almost as if she were hiding away, not wanting to be seen. And yet, you couldn’t miss her because she noticed her right away.   
  
Nico always saw her.   
  
Mr. Dean taps on his stand, grabbing everyone’s attention, “Choir, stand up,” he instructs.   
  
Nico listens, her eyes focusing down on the one brightness in the room, her mouth slightly hanging in amazement. As if she’s never heard this sound before.   
  
A sound so beautiful, the angels and heavens stop to listen in.   
  
When she catches herself, she forces herself to look down.   
  
_Stop staring Nico, it’s weird._  
  
And as the last note is played, the choir stops.   
  
Mr. Dean makes a point to compliment everyone, even poking at his daughter. 

“Beautiful job Karolina,” he commends, she smiles softly back at him.   
  
Beautiful indeed, Nico can’t help but agree. 

* * *

The day goes by as interesting as any other day in their small little town.   
  
Mr. Dean puts the senior recital sign-up sheet and Nico takes a moment to stare at it. He did say this was mandatory. It’s not like they would miss her or anything, at the same time, she might as well have.  
  
_Nico Minoru_. She scribbles fast before rushing to her next class. AP English.   
  
“And before we wrap up here,” Ms. Danvers scribbles on the board, “hell is other people. Sartre.”  
  
She turns and faces the perplexed stares returning to her. She sighs as the bell rings, saving everyone.   
  
“Five hundred words on Sartre’s use of thwarted desire, Monday,” she announces. 

With that, Nico packs up, watching the class disappear right before her eyes. 

“Eight different takes on Plato. Consider me impressed.”  
  
Nico smirks, pulling out her copy of the essay, “don’t know what you’re talking about. It’s just the one,” she places on her desk.   
  
Ms. Danvers smiles, “that’s exactly what I tell the bartender.”  
  
“And yet, you never turn me in.”   
  
“And have to read the actual essays they’d write?” Ms. Danvers winces, grabbing a few sheets from her desk and inching them forward.   
  
Nico takes one glance and immediately knows what they are.   
  
“You know I’m going to Atlas University.”   
  
Ms. Danvers shakes her head, “damn shame.”

“Damn full ride.” Nico argues, “and it works that way. I can stay at home, plus, I get to stay in lovely Gibborim.”   
  
“Gib-boring,” Ms. Danvers points.   
  
“It’s not that bad,” Nico defends. Ms. Danvers tilts her head, “okay, it’s not that good either but it’s what’s happening.”   
  
Ms. Danvers slides the folder back Nico’s way, “I spent four of the best years of my life at East Gaea.”   
  
Nico tilts her head in return, “and look at you, back home in Gib-boring.”  
  
Ms. Danvers nods, “you’re right. Stay away from the liberal arts.”   
  
Nico grins, moving over to take the folder anyways, knowing deep down she wasn’t actually going to do anything with it. It wasn’t like she could risk leaving her dad and this town behind. “Try not to get fired over the weekend.”   
  
“Are you kidding me? This whole town fears God, but you know who God, himself fears? The Teachers Union.”   
  
Nico spares a chuckle before bidding her goodbye, trotting down the school hall.   
  
At least the day was now over and she could resume her Nico like styling back in the comfort of her own home. 

* * *

The bike ride back was fairly the same. Nothing new. At least it had warmed up from this morning. 

She just didn’t know if that was necessarily a good or bad thing.   
  
“MINI-ORUUUU,” a boyish voice belts out again, the same truck passing by her.   
  
_Doesn’t that ever get old?_ She thinks to herself, making sure to show no emotion.   
  
She was used to it by now.   
  
“Hey!” another voice screams.   
  
Deciding to ignore it and peddle on, Nico knew she had other, far more important things to worry about.   
  
“HEY!” the voice grows progressively closer, but she knew better than to listen.   
  
“HEEEY! HEY!!! HOLD ON!”   
  
Before Nico could comprehend what was going on, there is a strong tug on her basket, and gravity suddenly pulls her down.   
  
“Whoa!” Nico yelps, landing face-first into the ground.   
  
Angered, Nico immediately jolts up, “what is wrong with you?” she growls, grabbing her things and composing herself. 

She was used to the name-calling and teasing, but this had to be a new kind of low.   
  
“I’m sorry. I, uh…” the boy stammers. 

Nico immediately recognizes him. The town was far too small for her to not know basically everybody. In front of her was none other than Chase Stein. Son of Victor Stein, owner of Stein Sausages. Chase was better known as the captain of Atlas High’s pride and joy, the lacrosse team. The only team to win any real games. 

Not that it was a lot, but worth the effort, she supposes.   
  
Chase struggles to pull something out of his backpack, leaving Nico stunned and confused.

And then she sees him hold a few papers in his hand and she immediately knew what was about to happen. Only she was confused as to why they were meeting now and now at school.   
  
“Fifteen for three pages, twenty-five for four to ten. Not in the over-ten-page biz,” she explains, “payment once you get an A, but I'll take half price if you get anything less.”   
  
He shakes his head, “no, I’m not trying to cheat.”   
  
_Sure. That’s what they all say._  
  
“Nobody is. Whose class is it for?”  
  
“No, it-it’s not… um…” he holds out the papers for her to grab.   
  
“What’s this?”   
  
Chase scratches his head, “a letter.”  
  
“Who the hell writes letters these days?”   
  
“I-I thought it’d seem romantic,” he explains. 

Nico immediately opens it, her eyes drawing to the name boldly printed on top.   
  
_Dear Karolina Dean. I think you’re really beautiful._  
  
And that is a large hell no right there.   
  
Nico scoffs, folding the papers back on themselves and handing it to him. “Can’t help you.”   
  
Panicking, Chase steps forward, “wait, I-I just need a few words. Good ones. Romantic ones.”  
  
Nico stops, unable to consider it for a split second, “I’m not writing to Karolina De-” she stops, shaking her head. 

“I’m not writing to some girl. It’d be wrong. A letter is personal. It’s supposed to be authentic.”  
  
Chase eagerly smiles, “that’d be awesome.”  
  
“No!” Nico deflects, “I won’t, no, I can’t be you being authentic.”   
  
She sighs, his puppy dog face filled with hope, “look, get a thesaurus, use spell-check. Good luck, Romeo.”   
  
She scoffs before walking away.   
  
“No, I can pay more for authentic,” he pleads.   
  
But it’s too late.   
  
Nico had already made up her mind. 

* * *

Dinner soon arrived, which were made up of her own microwavable pot-pies.   
  
Five hundred words on Sartre. She might as well begin writing her paper before she had to write eight more. As she typed away, the static sound of the TV creaked in the background. Right before a burst of electricity captures her attention.   
  
Sighing, she turns to face her father. 

In Japanese, she asks him, “did you call the power company?”   
  
Her father looks down, solemnly, “they don’t understand my accent.”   
  
“Did you try?”   
  
Her father looks up at the TV screen before shushing her, grinning he replies in English, “best part.”   
  
And one cue, he repeats the line from the film, “I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”   
  
A beat passes and he tilts his head to smile at her. Nico smiles back.   
  
“Fine, I’ll call tomorrow,” she responds, grabbing more of her pot pie before turning their attention onto the screen.

The following morning comes by and Nico makes sure to dial the company first, annoyingly becoming in tune with the familiar greeting.   
  
“Thank you for calling Gibborim’s Power and Light. We appreciate our customers and intend on getting right back to you. Please hold and one of our amazing support agents will answer your call as soon as possible.”   
  
Nico groans. Here we go.   
  
An hour flies by and she finally grabs ahold of her first set of years.   
  
“I’m calling for account 408K98,” she states.   
  
“Please hold,” the machine states before sounds of classical music begins playing.   
  
Yup.   
  
She eventually makes it to the school, when the voice comes back on.   
  
“Please re-enter your selection.”   
  
“Bill. Extension.”   
  
Nico struts down the hallway, her helmet still attached to her head. Before she could make it to her locker, she sees Chase at his, surrounded by his friends.

Knowing that boy didn’t sound ready to quit, she instantly swerves into another hall.   
  
“Please hold,” the voice goes again. 

Crap.   
  
Lucky for her, the first period was a free period. With no one using the music room, she decides what better time than to get practice in.   
  
An hour passes by too fast because before she knew it, Nico was back in the halls, navigating her way to AP Psych before she spots Chase again, this time at the end of the hall.   
  
_Good God_ , she groans, immediately taking the next left.   
  
Can this damn phone answer already before she actually starts to lose it.   
  
Suddenly a sharp pain hits her left shoulder, tossing her onto the floor.   
  
_Seriously Nico, twice in the span of two days._  
  
“Watch it,” a voice snarls before disappearing.   
  
You ran into me, she mutters to herself. Immediately falling to the ground, she rushes forward to grab her fallen books and scattered papers, all while other students idly passed by her.   
  
A voice appears, bending down to help, “these hallways are murder.”   
  
Nico looks up, eyes widening. Right in front of her was Karolina Dean. The Karolina Dean. Blonde hair, blue eyes, and the kindest of smiles.   
  
Gulping, she figures out the words to say.   
  
“I’m Nico Minoru.”   
  
Karolina smirks, “yes, I know. You’ve only been playing my mom’s services every Sunday for, like, four years. And we’re in the same music education class.”   
  
Nico felt frozen, staring back at her for a long minute.   
  
“Don’t tell anyone, but you’re her favorite pianist. My dad even agrees, they can’t handle mediocre accompanists. Even if they are saved.”  
  
She looks down, something else capturing her attention.   
  
“Prophecy of Xartan,” she lifts the book, handing back to Nico. “Loved it. All that talk about prophecy, love, and uniting of words. Sounds pretty hopeful if you ask me.”   
  
Karolina reaches down to grab the one last item on the floor. Her phone. She holds it out for Nico to grab.   
  
In that split moment, their fingers touch, and a jolt of electricity surges through her body.   
  
Just in time for the bell to ring.   
  
“See you around Nico Minoru,” she says, before walking away.  
  
Nico places the phone back onto her ear, watching idly. Once she was out of earshot, reality comes crashing down on her.  
  
Groaning, her shoulders sag, “I’m Nico Minoru?”   
  
_What kind of greeting was that? Of course, she knew who she was._  
  
“Yes, I know. Your bill is four months overdue, Ms. Minoru. If we don’t get a minimum payment of fifty dollars, your power will terminate tomorrow.”   
  
_Shit._  
  
And as if God were watching her, Chase appears at the end of the hall, slightly red and out of breath.   
  
Nico hangs up the phone as they make eye contact. 

“Fifty dollars, one letter. After that, you’re on your own.”   
  
Chase smiles, fist-bumping the air, “YES!” 


	2. Chapter 2

Nico rolls her eyes, turning away to head to class, hearing the shuffle of Chase’s feet follow behind her. It isn’t until the next turn into a different hallway where she becomes dubious.   
  
“What are you doing?” she asks, feeling the weight of him following from behind.   
  
“I-I thought we were doing it now?”   
  
“No?” Nico shakes her head, “We have classes right now. Meet me at the church this afternoon.”  
  
Chase nods belligerently, before waving his hand and turning into the other direction, “see you!”   
  
Nico ignores him, walking late into her next period.   
  
_This was not going to end well, was it?_

* * *

_Dear Karolina Dean,_  
  
 _I think your really beautiful. But even if you were ugly, I’d want to know you. Cuz you are smart and nice too. It’s hard to find all those things in one girl. But even if you were only two of those things, I’d be into it. But you’re like all three. Just to be clear._  
  
Nico pauses to eye Chase, who brightly adds on, “she is all three.”   
  
“Thanks for clarifying,” she nods.   
  
_About me. I’m kind of cute. Some people think I’m the cutest one on the lacrosse team! Those people being my mom and the coach, which so happens to also be my dad. Who also owns Stein Sausages. He got his old recipes from my grandfather, who is dead now. Never mind my dead grandfather. All I am saying is that I love milkshakes. Protein milkshakes to be exact but I can definitely go for some regular milkshakes. Would you like to get some with me sometime? I work part-time and I have a truck. Let me know whenever. Thanks._  
  
 _Chase Stein, goalie and occasional defender, lacrosse._  
  
Nico stops. Her eyes zeroing down on the obvious mistakes in grammar. Seeing the ‘your’ rather than ‘you’re’ was the first one, not to mention the talk about his dead grandfather was enough to make her regret saying yes.   
  
Ms. Danvers said grades would be out in the next few days, maybe she could stretch it out until then.   
  
“So what you’re trying to say is-”  
  
“I’m in love with her,” he firmly states, with such sureness she’s already doubting him.   
  
“Have you ever spoken to her?”  
  
Chase shakes his head, “I’m not good with words.”   
  
“But you know you love her?”  
  
“I know I think about her when I wake up,” he starts, “and when I’m running or when I’m eating my dad’s turkey sausage and when I’m in class and when-”  
  
Nico stops him. 

“That just means you’re stubborn,” and a fool, she thinks. “Not that you’re in love.”  
  
“No, it’s love,” Chase argues. “Love makes you gooey.”   
  
Nico eyes narrow, “and what exactly is that?”

“You know, gooey. Warm and airy inside, like German chocolate,” Chase explains, “don’t you get gooey?”  
  
“No,” Nico looks back at the letter, whispering, “not at all.”   
  
Chase just stares as she begins to comb through the section, “this whole first sentence is wrong but milkshakes don’t sound half as bad. Protein shakes might be a stretch but it’s a start.”   
  
“Oh, I get it,” Chase mutters.   
  
“Get what?”   
  
“You’ve never been in love.”   
  
Nico felt oddly offended. Of course, she’s never been in love. She was only eighteen living in a town far too small with responsibilities far too great.   
  
Irritated, she begins packing her things. Her mind was already made up. She was going to prove Mr. Romeo wrong.   
  
When she finishes, she shoves the sorry excuse of a letter back into Chase’s arms.   
  
“You want a letter about love? I’ll write you a letter about love.” Nico boldly states. No one was going to put her out on the spot like that, not even Mr. Prince Charming himself.   
  
Storming out she could hear his words trail behind, “one that’ll make her fall in love with me, not storm off in a huff like you’re doing!!!” 

* * *

It had been roughly six hours since her last conversation with Chase and for once, Nico Minoru was fresh out of words.   
  
_Karolina,_  
  
Is about all she had scribbled across the white lined paper.  
  
Right before she could give up, she looks up at the TV, her dad playing Wings of Desire in the background.   
  
Slightly turning to face her father, “this isn’t even American. How are you going to learn English?”   
  
Not sparing a single glance back at her, he shushes her, before responding back, “best part.”   
  
Knowingly, Nico turns back to face the screen, her father’s voice filling the creeks of silence in the air.   
  
“Longing…longing for a wave of love to swell up in me.”   
  
And right there, it hits her.   
  
She knew what she wanted to say.   
  
_Karolina,_  
  
 _Longing for a wave of love that would stir in me. That’s what makes me clumsy. The absence of pleasure. The desire for love. Desire to love._  
  
 _Chase_  
  
Although it held such few words, it was probably the hardest fifty-dollars she ever earned. 

* * *

The following morning, Nico decides to seal the letter before giving it to Chase.   
  
When he holds it out in front of him, his face morphs into one of confusion.   
  
“I don’t get to read it?”   
  
Rolling her eyes, she turns to walk away.   
  
“No, no I’m sure it’s great!”   
  
“Venmo me then,” she says, maneuvering her way back to class. At least now she could pay the electricity bill.   
  
At least now, it was over with.   
  
And then it wasn’t.   
  
While on the way home, her usual way home, she could hear a voice calling out of her.   
  
“Hey!” Chase yells.   
  
Deciding to ignore him, she continues on.   
  
“Hey wait,” he yells again, “she wrote back.”   
  
Nico halts, the squeaking sound of her break coming to a sudden stop. Chase runs up behind her, face slightly red, chest heaving every so subtly. He holds out the letter for her to read.   
  
_Dear Chase,_  
  
 _I enjoy Wim Wenders too. Wouldn’t have plagiarized him though._  
  
 _Karolina_  
  
Nico smiles, unsure of how to respond.   
  
She hated how interesting this was beginning to get.   
  
“Who is Wim Wenders and why’d you cheat off him? Chase scolds, apparently unhappy with the results.   
  
Did he not see it?   
  
“I didn’t cheat off him.”   
  
“No, I looked up the word ‘plagiarize’!”   
  
_Fine_.

“Okay, I kind of cheated off him.”   
  
“I paid you!” he whines.   
  
“But this is good,” she rebuttals, more than good.   
  
“How?”   
  
“It’s…” Nico pauses, “it’s like a game. She’s, like, challenging us. But in a good way.”  
  
Chase rubs his temples, his face was slightly confused (more confused than usual).   
  
“So, um… uh, we’re, we’re still in the game?”   
  
“Yep,” Nico hums in agreement. “We are. So, yay,” her voice kind of deflates at the end. She holds out her fist for a slight fist bump, which he reciprocates.  
  
Awkwardly holding onto the letter, Nico gets back onto her bike and scurries away.   
  
This is far from over Karolina Dean.   
  
“Game on,” she mutters to herself. 

* * *

_Dear Karolina,_  
  
 _Okay, you got me. I sometimes hide behind other people’s words._  
  
 _For one thing, I know nothing about love. I’m seventeen. I’ve lived in Gibborim my whole life._  
  
Nico stops, her body immediately jolting up at the sounds of nearby trains. Her eyes trail to the clock, quickly rushing to grab her things.  
  
The note would have to wait.   
  
Dinner comes by and just as usual, they have potpies in front of the same plastered television, playing another classic movie.   
  
And then her phone goes off.   
  
**_Chase Stein_**  
 _Same time tomorrow?_  
  
 ** _Nico Minoru_**  
 _Sure._  
  
 ** _Chase Stein_**  
👍🏻😎✌🏻  
  
The next time they meet at the church, Chase asks to read the note (to make sure she wasn’t cheating again, not that he would’ve caught on if she were.)  
  
He looks up, unamused, “Such a downer.”   
  
“It’s not a downer,” Nico defends, it was the truth.   
  
“A major downer.” Chase reiterates, “ask her to hang out.”   
  
Nico scoffs. He was kidding, right?   
  
Before they could get into it, the church doors burst open revealing two other meat-headed jokes, Brandon and Lucas.   
  
“Hey yo man, what are you doing?” Brandon questions.   
  
Chase stands up, slightly thrown, “confession dude.”   
  
Lucas laughs, “Well, Brando’s cousin is throwing a party, we’re all getting together, you in?”   
  
“Yeah, yeah. For sure,” Chase agrees, immediately standing up and following them outside.   
  
Nico waits a few minutes longer, before making her own hastily exit back home, right in time for her shift to begin.   
  
Once the trains passed through, she returns to the comfort of her space and continues writing.   
  
_My dad owns a sausage shop and occasionally, I could go for a really good milkshake. I hang out with my friends. I keep my head down. I’m a simple guy. Which is to say if I knew what love was, I would quote myself._  
  
 _Chase._  
  
Deciding it was enough, she seals the note.  
  
Laying on her bed, she allows her mind to drift.   
  
What has she gotten herself into?   
  
Before her mind could remain at ease, the sounds of clattering jars her awake. She stands, maneuvering towards the sound in time to catch a glimpse of Chase as he dumps trash.   
  
“CHASE STEIN, SAUSAGES ARE NOT GOING TO MAKE THEMSELVES,” a voice yells, prompting the taller faired haired boy back inside. 

Once he disappears, Nico rubs her eyes, before circling in on open case next to her bed.   
  
Decidedly, she pulls out her guitar and begins to write. 

* * *

The following morning, she arrives at school earlier than usual to place the note into Karolina’s locker.   
  
Chase probably would’ve minded, but it was her words nonetheless.   
  
She then goes about her day, not even thinking it about (or so she wanted to believe). When school ended, she made her way to church to get some practice in for this upcoming Sunday worship.   
  
“Pssst!” a voice calls out from the confessional booth, followed by soft knocking.   
  
Intrigued, and slightly confused she turns her head, “in here!”   
  
Making her way to the booth, she thought of all the things, a booth was Chase’s choice.   
  
Which led her back to the first point, did this man not have a phone? Or the sense to use one.  
  
When she reaches the booth, she shuts the curtain behind her. “Isn’t this sacrilegious?”   
  
She may not believe in God or whatever these people believed in, but even she knew this felt wrong.   
  
“She wrote back,” he says, leaning forward with the letter in hand.   
  
_Dear Chase,_  
  
 _You know it takes eleven muscles to yawn? This is the sort of weird fact I find myself recalling to keep myself from well, yawning, or showing anything I feel really. So, yeah I turn to other people’s words, too._  
  
 _When you’re a pretty girl, and I know it makes me sound conceited, but that’s why you’re even writing to me, right?_  
  
Nico stops the sound of church doors opening motion the snapping of heads for both her and Chase. When the voices fade, she shakes it off, continuing to read the letter.   
  
_When you’re a pretty girl, people want to give you things. What they really want is to make you like them. Not like them as in, ‘I like you,’ but like them as in, ‘I am like you.’_  
  
 _So I’m like a lot of people, which makes me kind of no one._  
  
 _Karolina_  
  
Nico stops reading. Her heart faintly racing, biting back the words circling in her mind.  
  
You aren’t just anyone Karolina Dean.   
  
This was different now. Strangely, this was exhilarating for her. The mind that was Karolina Dean was far from the perceived images that this town painted her out to be, making Nico want more.   
  
“So… can I text her now?” Chase asks, breaking her from her train of thought.   
  
“Too soon,” Nico states. Far too soon. Not when they were just beginning.   
  
“No, I’m gonna do it,” Chase agrees, pulling out his phone.   
  
“If you want her to think you’re like everyone else,” Nico blurts.   
  
Chase sighs deeply, before typing on his phone.   
  
Great, he was doing it.   
  
Ending a good thing right before it could really start. This is what she got for helping a jock like him.   
  
_DING._  
  
Nico’s eyes peer down and she sees a notification from her Venmo app. Fifty dollars sent right from Chase’s account.   
  
So, he did know how to use his phone.   
  
Looking up, it suddenly didn’t feel as good, the money that is. Not the same as reading Karolina’s letter.   
  
“So?” Chase draws, the silence filling the conventional booth.   
  
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Nico states, immediately rushing out. She grabs her belongings and heads on home.   
  
In her little space, she pulls out a sheet of paper and immediately begins writing.   
  
_Dear Karolina,_  
  
 _I get it. There is a certain comfort in using words that do not belong to you. It’s safe._  
  
 _I never thought about fitting in before. And I certainly never really thought about the oppression of fitting in before. The good thing about being different is that no one expects you to be like them. Some people are more different than others… you might be surprised._  
  
 _The surprising thing is people don’t see what they’re not looking for._  
  
 _As far as I’m concerned, they just keep looking. The world is full of them. The insensitive will continue digging in the dirt until the end is reached and then they will stop. Others will go beyond that, continue digging until the surface is broken on the other side._  
  
 _Not to say which one is me._  
  
Nico stops. She contemplates signing Chase’s name once more.  
  
It’s not like Karolina wouldn’t know who it was from.   
  
Deciding it was better to keep it unsigned, she wraps it up and heads back to bed, not before sending a text to Chase.   
  
**_Nico Minoru_**  
 _Done with the new letter. I will give it to you tomorrow morning._  
  
 ** _Chase Stein_**  
🤩🍦🐻  
  
  
The following morning, Nico’s bike ride to school is halted with the sounds of voices, well, only really one particular voice.   
  
“Good morning,” Chase smiles, gripping onto his backpack.   
  
Nico holds out the letter for him. Once in his hands, she immediately takes off.   
  
Chase stares at her before running behind, “hold on,” he yells.   
  
Nico chooses to ignore him, peddling away. They go on for about a mile when he speaks up again.   
  
“Hey wait for me!!” he yells, panting this time.   
  
But she doesn’t wait. 

* * *

In the next two days, she receives radio silence from Chase’s end.   
  
Deciding it was nothing she wanted to particularly worry about, she goes about the rest of her day.   
  
(Or well, that’s what she kept telling herself.)   
  
The truth is, she drove herself up a wall wondering. Did Karolina get her letter? Did she respond and Chase was just keeping it to himself?   
  
All the waiting became the reason she’s stopped writing for others.   
  
And then something odd happens.   
  
One particular morning, she arrives at school right on time for the first bell, after she parks her things, she makes a beeline for the bathroom, wanting to wash off the train grease from this morning.   
  
This is what she gets for waking up late.   
  
As she washes her hands, she hears voices from behind the stall.  
  
“Did you see Aura’s new post?”   
  
“Ugh yes, so gross.”   
  
“It’s as if she is just asking to be made fun of.”   
  
The voices felt familiar enough that Nico could assume one belonged to Eiffel and the other one of her girls, with a name she never bothered to learn.   
  
Deciding to tune them out, she scrubs vigorously the grease from her hands until the door is propped open revealing the warmness encapsulated in light blue eyes. 

Karolina Dean makes her way to the other end of the bathroom, falling behind her, seemingly waiting for a stall to open. Nico forces herself to look down, too afraid her face would scream the truth she had been desperately trying to keep in.   
  
Did you get my letter? Why haven’t you responded back? Is everything okay?   
  
Unable to listen stand her thoughts, she tilts her head up before immediately shutting it down.   
  
What was she thinking?   
  
She attempts to ignore the butterflies rising in her chest. Ignoring her inner turmoil, she looks up again, reaching those ocean blue eyes.  
  
Karolina had been looking at her through the mirror.   
  
As their eyes reached one another, Karolina’s lips form a small smile.   
  
Unsure, Nico looks down again.   
  
Was this really happening?  
  
No, just scrub your hands because damn does train grease hit differently. 

“Did you see Vaughn today?” one voice speaks up.   
  
At the sound of his name, Nico noticed how visibly uncomfortable Karolina seemed.   
  
“Ugh, yes. He checked in at Timely’s.”   
  
“Karolina is so lucky.”   
  
“Totes. They aren’t even really together, which is wild. I don’t get why she doesn’t just say yes to being his girlfriend. He’s hot and his family owns half of Gibborim.”   
  
“Crazy must run in her family,” the other voice attacks, before the two of them, break into fits of laughter. 

Concerned, Nico looks up at Karolina, a moment of embarrassment and sadness splattered across her face.   
  
“You’re so rude, Eiffel.” 

“You know I’m right.”   
  
(Say something Nico.)  
  
Before she could, Karolina is gone.   
  
Nico sighs. Small towns and their dire need for drama. Gossip raged all the buzz in here. When there was a juicy story to spread, it grew like wildfire. The narrative behind Karolina’s family happened to be one of those legends. It was before Karolina was born. Her mother, the founder of the church was married to another man. One that wasn’t Jonah Dean.   
  
In fact, Dean wasn’t his last name. He took it up after they got married. Before him, was Frank Dean. Better known as Karolina’s biological father.   
  
Stories say he left them for another family, others say he died. The only real truth was that he was gone with no trace to be found.   
  
And that is about how far Nico knew about the situation.   
  
Dishearten, she finishes cleaning up. When she walks out, she notices Karolina at her locker. Before she could even come up with the guts to approach her, she turns away, shutting her locker and walking in the other direction.   
  
Unable to get over the last conversation, she decides to leave it at that.   
  
While she makes her way towards the other end of the school, she feels a hand grab onto her wrist, pulling her away.   
  
Right in front of her is Ms. Danvers, shutting the door, holding up the familiar piece of paper.   
  
“Care to explain?” Ms. Danvers says.   
  
Nico looks down at the familiar words, a bubbling twist of uneasiness forming, “there’s nothing to explain.”   
  
“Are you sure about that?”   
  
Nico contemplates.  
  
“Nico,” Ms. Danvers approaches, her tone softer. “You know you can tell me anything.”   
  
Nico sighs, dropping the paper onto her desk. “How’d you know?”   
  
Ms. Danvers moves over to the board, resting her back against it. “I’ve been acquainted with your writing for quite some time Ms. Minoru, it doesn’t take a genius to figure it out.”   
  
Nico nods, taking the empty seat in front of her. She remains quiet for a long moment, eventually prompting Ms. Danvers.   
  
“I’m not holding you against your will, Nico,” Ms. Danvers adds on, “talk to me or not, that is going to be on you.”   
  
“It’s a long story,” Nico eventually starts.   
  
“Good thing I have a free period right now.”   
  
Nico nods, starting from the very first day she ran into Chase and the whole mess that prompted this. Ignoring the fact that she may or may not have feelings for the blue-eyed girl. Not that she wouldn’t be surprised if Ms. Danvers caught on.   
  
Ms. Danvers listens intently, her face remains unchanged. Was she so surprised that Nico needed the cash?   
  
“So, this is why half my class is failing their essays?”   
  
Nico looks down, remembering the number of requests she already denied for the Sartre’s essay and with the new topic being announced this week, she could already see the havoc, “I’ll be re-opened for business soon enough. This won’t go on much longer.”   
  
“Nico that isn’t what-” Ms. Danvers begins, but it’s too late.   
  
Nico knew what she had to do.   
  
No matter how good this feeling felt, it eventually had to end. Chase paid her. Her letter was done. There was nothing keeping her now.   
  
And then, as fate would allow it, Chase appears at the church with another letter in hand.   
  
“It came by today,” he says, holding it out in front of him. “Look, I have to get to work so I’ll catch you later.”   
  
Nico hums in agreement, holding the letter in her hand.   
  
_Dear Chase,_  
  
 _The obvious unseen. People will look and miss what’s painfully spelled out right in front of them. Life is funny that way. Doesn’t everyone think they’re different, but pretty much we’re all different in the same way?_  
  
 _Which one are you then?_  
  
Interestingly, Nico bites on her lip.   
  
With this in her hand, she can’t help but not respond.   
  
In many places, that form of non-communication is considered rude.   
  
And so, it began.   
  
_Dear Karolina,_  
  
 _Says the girl perched on the rarefied peak of Mt. Popularity._  
  
 _Me? I already told you who I am. But if you had to know, I guess there is only one way to find out._  
  
  
_Dear Chase,_  
  
 _Easy, Mr. I Know Nothing About Love. I may surprise you._  
  
 _I’ve been thinking about what you said about seeing and not seeing. It reminded me of something I heard before. I had a painting teacher once told me that the difference between a good painting and a great painting is typically five strokes. And they’re usually the five boldest strokes in the painting_  
  
 _The question, of course, is which five strokes?_  
  
  
  
Nico looked at the picture of the painting attached to the letter. After giving it some thought, she saw it. Excitedly, she bolts to Chase’s shop, once again finding him taking out the trash.   
  
“Look at this,” she shoves the photo in his face.   
  
“That’s… um cool and very red,” Chase points out, “looks almost orange.”   
  
Nico shakes her head, before explaining the stroke lines and how this had to be the stroke. The one that made the painting.   
  
It was so clear that it almost hurt how he didn’t understand.   
  
That night she went home, still intrigued by the way that Karolina thought.   
  
The words that she spoke versus the way this town painted her to be. It was all-consuming and different. A good different.   
  
_Dear Karolina,_  
  
 _I get it. After one’s slaved away at making a pretty good painting the last thing you’d want to do is make a bold stroke and potentially ruin everything._  
  
 _PS. It wasn’t hard to miss once you knew what to look for_  
  
  
 _Dear Chase,_  
  
 _I’ll never admit it, but that’s why I gave up painting._  
  
 _And now, I wonder if that is how I’m living my life. It’s a pretty good life. Probably the best life one could hope for in Gibborim._  
  
  
 _Dear Karolina,_  
  
 _Perhaps. But how well do you really know Gibborim?_  
  
 _34.1366° N_  
 _118.2942° W_  
  
 _. . ._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> should i do a karolina chapter or keep it with nico? lmk!! 
> 
> thank u again for reading :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> karolina's pov!!!

**Karolina’s POV**  
  
When the first note appeared in her locker, Karolina was sure someone was playing with her.   
  
Who even wrote letters nowadays?   
  
And yet, curiosity got the better of her, prompting her to open the note anyways.   
  
The first thing she noticed was that it was, indeed addressed to her.   
  
_Longing for a wave of love that would stir in me. That’s what makes me clumsy. The absence of pleasure. The desire for love. Desire to love._  
  
It takes her a second, familiarity returning as she recognized the phrase. Signed at the bottom by none other than Chase Stein.   
  
Which was odd because Chase was the last person she’d imagine quoting Wim Wenders.   
  
Undecided, she shuts her locker door and scurries over to her next period, the note edged into her mind.   
  
Which lasts for about the entire next period.   
  
Thinking about it now, maybe this was a sign.   
  
He never pegged as Karolina’s type but he had kind eyes and a soft smile. He didn’t own half the city, but his family did own a business. That had to count for something.   
  
So, she takes a chance and writes him back.   
  
What is the worst that could happen?  
  
_Dear Chase,_  
  
 _I enjoy Wim Wenders too. Wouldn’t have plagiarized him though._  
  
 _Karolina_  
  
Content folds the paper and slides it through his lockers right before lunch.   
  
It was a bit of a joke but also a test. Because the idea that Chase Stein, resident lacrosse junkie, was capable of stringing more than three words together astonished her. If he was anything she perceived him as he’ll take it as a challenge of sorts.   
  
Match set.

* * *

“Karolina, dear,” her mother’s voice bellows from the living area. Karolina sighs, slowly shutting the door behind her.  
  
“Yes?” Karolina twitches her nose.   
  
“Vaughn stopped by,” her eyes twinkled, the kind that only made her stomach turn, “he wanted you to have these”   
  
Of course, he did.   
  
Karolina’s eyes snap back to the brightly colored bouquet in her hand. “That’s sweet of him,” Karolina agrees, walking over to grab the flowers.   
  
Her mother nods, watching as she moved towards the sink. The sixth bouquet this month. Was he not tired yet?  
  
“I don’t understand why you don’t answer him,” her mother drops.   
  
And there it was. The dreaded conversation. The subtleness finally being dragged up to the surface.   
  
Luckily for Karolina, she already knew an answer that would satisfy everyone, for the time being, everyone especially both her parents and ideally Vaughn.   
  
“I would answer him,” Karolina begins, articulating her words carefully, afraid it may be lost in translation, “I’m just focusing on school and getting into college right now. A full ride isn’t going to appear out of nowhere.”   
  
Karolina’s breath hitches. She knew money was an issue for her family. Not that they didn’t have any, but that they wanted more. Vaughn’s family owns half the town and for her to marry him, it would be a game-changer.  
  
And yet, the thought of their only daughter getting a full ride to a prestigious university. Now that spoke to them much more.   
  
Her mom smiles, the ease splattered across her blue eyes. With that, she turns to walk back into the office area.   
  
Relief washes over her and she goes back to fixing the sixth bouquet when her mother’s voice interrupts her, “you make me proud Karolina, don’t you forget that.”   
  
Karolina’s heart cracks.  
  
 _If only you knew._  
  
She plasters a smile, “thank you, mom.”   
  
With that, her mother is content with the conversation, walking away.   
  
Karolina sighs, finishing up the bouquet. The truth is, she always knew she was different from the start.   
  
She didn’t know it explicitly then, but the more she thought about it, the more it began to make sense.   
  
It started in first grade when she met Destiny Gonzales and quickly became enamored with her.   
  
Luckily, their families were close. They spent most of their grade school with one another. But right before high school, Destiny’s father got a new job, prompting her to move halfway across the country. And Karolina spent most of her time wondering if she was jealous that she finally escaped this retched town or sad because the only person that understood was gone.   
  
And then things changed when Nico Minoru appeared into her life.   
  
The first time that she talks to Nico, it’s right before freshman year of high school. Her father had been auditioning for a new pianist replacement.   
  
Nico appeared on their church stage and wooed everyone away. No one could understand how God gifted someone who refused to believe in him. Her parent’s favorite heathen.   
  
The next couple of years Karolina built the courage to speak to her, only ever coming up short.   
  
It wasn’t like Nico was seeking to speak to her anyway.   
  
And then something happened.   
  
_***flashback to a few days ago***_

Karolina stared at the clock, watching time flash before her. Her mind drifts to earlier today when she caught Nico playing piano during the study hall. She thought about the way she sounded distressed or her ability to play, even with background noise as bothersome as could be.   
  
“Are you coming out with us or not?” Eiffel crosses her arms, leaning into Vaughn’s side. Karolina breaks out of her trance to notice she had company.   
  
“She is,” Vaughn immediately answers for her, moving to place his arm around her “right babe?”   
  
Disgusted Karolina plasters a fake small smile, before shaking her head, “I told my dad I would help him today, maybe next time.”   
  
Before Vaughn could protest (and Karolina knew he would), Eiffel and her group step it.   
  
“See you then Lina,” she grabs ahold of Vaughn’s hand and drags him away. Vaughn sends her a pleading look, but at that moment Karolina couldn’t help but be grateful for someone like Eiffel.   
  
They rush towards the busy hall, as Karolina’s eyes land on the familiar brown-eyed girl who has hounded her thoughts for the past three years. She watches Eiffel purposely runs into her, knocking her down. Without sparing a single thought, she moves over to where she is, kneeling in front of her.   
  
“These hallways are murder.”   
  
Nico’s eyes widen, a dumbfounded look appearing on her face. “I’m Nico Minoru,” is what comes out.   
  
Karolina smirks, “yes, I know. You’ve only been playing my mom’s services every Sunday for, like, four years.”  
  
Not that I’ve been staring or thinking about you these past four years.   
  
“And we’re in the same music education class,” she adds. Less creepy.   
  
Nico just stands there, not saying anything back.   
  
“Don’t tell anyone, but you’re her favorite pianist. My dad even agrees, they can’t handle mediocre accompanists. Even if they are saved.”   
  
Karolina looks down, immediately noticing the book. One of her favorites, not that she would admit it to anyone.   
  
“Prophecy of Xartan,” she lifts the book, handing back to Nico. “Loved it. All that talk about prophecy, love, and uniting of worlds. Sounds pretty hopeful if you ask me.”   
  
Karolina reaches down to grab the one last item on the floor. Her phone. She holds it out for Nico to grab.   
  
In that split moment, their fingers touch, and a jolt of electricity surges through her body. And Karolina suddenly wishes she was bold enough to say what was on her mind.   
  
Instead, they fall into a short silence, and Karolina decides to give her a way out.   
  
“See you around Nico Minoru,” she smiles, before walking away.  
  
Karolina exhales, the memory sprawled across her mind. Shaking her head to rid of such feelings brewing in her chest as she finishes up fixing the flowers.   
  
And then another letter appears.   
  
_Dear Karolina,_  
  
 _Okay, you got me. I sometimes hide behind other people’s words. For one thing, I know nothing about love. I’m seventeen. I’ve lived in Gibborim my whole life. I hang out with my friends. I keep my head down. I’m a simple guy. Which is to say if I knew what love was, I would quote myself._  
  
 _Chase._  
  
Intrigued, Karolina feels compelled to respond.   
  
And so, it began.   
  
The train of letters that breeds fulfillment within Karolina’s being. For once, in her eighteen years of existence, there was someone who understood her.   
  
Chase Stein, of all people.   
  
His ability to string along words that were unsafe and exciting brought out a sort of longing. Longing for more. Days drew by and the more excited she began to feel.   
  
_Dear Karolina,_  
  
 _Perhaps. But how well do you really know Gibborim?_  
  
 _34.1366° N_  
 _118.2942° W_  
  
 _. . ._  
  
Upon noticing the coordinates, Karolina raises her eyebrow in contemplation, before grabbing her things and going anyways.  
  
With that, she stumbles upon a blank concrete wall, with the words “Any 5 strokes” splattered across. Down below are spray cans against the wall.   
  
Karolina smiles.   
  
Another challenge. 

She picks up one of the cans and places her first move, ignoring all her feelings of common sense. 

“Your move…” she mutters under her breath.   
  
  
_“Oh, so that’s your boldest stroke?”_  
  
Karolina shakes her head, adding in color in.“I’m into the slow build. What was that?”   
  
  
_“Decisiveness. But please… take all the time you need to be BOLD.”_  
  
Hm. Bold, you say, Karolina thinks to herself.   
  
“Is this bold enough for you?”   
  
  
_“And thus was abstract art was born.”_  
  
Karolina sets down her own art supplies, already coming to a decision. Upon finishing, she takes a deep breath, taking in the image.   
  
“And transformed.”   
  
Part of her wanted to see and wait for Chase to appear, to discuss the beauty they created. And yet, she knew deep down, it wasn’t time yet. All part of the game.   
  
Instead, she found herself returning to this place, admiring the piece in front of her. The first art she’s created in awhile.   
  
“HEY!!” A voice yells, capturing Karolina’s attention. She turns her head slightly to witness Darius Davis screaming at her.   
  
“Shit,” she mutters, immediately taking off.   
  
“Hey!!” he screams again. Laughing, Karolina makes it out safely.   
  
The next time she visits, the work is gone, replaced by white paint.   
  
“Or not,” she responds.   
  
_“Everything beautiful is ruined eventually…”_   


  
_Dear Karolina,_  
  
 _Maybe that’s the thing. If you do ruin your painting, you gotta know you have everything in you to get to that pretty good painting again._  
  
“But if you never do the bold stroke…” Karolina whispers, reading the words of the paper.   
  
_You’ll never know if you could’ve had a great painting._  
  
  
  
Karolina places the letter down. Her mind spiraling. These feelings appearing out of nowhere, invading her entire being.   
  
And yet, she couldn’t help but feel as if something was still missing.   
  
_BUZZ._  
  
Her phone goes off and she glances over to see it’s Vaughn, inviting her out once again.   
  
Uninterested, she places her phone down and pulls out her sketchpad and begins stroking some lines.   
  
If she were to start, it had to be somewhere.   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> with everything going on in the US right now, I felt as if I shouldn't post nor did I have the energy to write but i had this up and i thought, might as well finish it 
> 
> so here it is! let me know how you feel! 
> 
> thank you for still reading :)

**Author's Note:**

> OKAY IF YOU'VE MADE THIS FAR, first let me start with a thank you for reading.
> 
> as many have already seen (i hope), the half of it is a netflix film highlighting the journey of Ellie Chu and Aster Flores (as well as others), directed and written by one of the greats, ms alice wu herself (who also wrote Saving Face). when I watched the movie, I couldn’t help but fall in love with it. being asian american myself, I could resonate certain points with Ellie but surprisingly very moreso with Aster, as I struggled for the longest time with my sexuality and religion. Growing up in the church, believing in God, and all that has always played such an important role in my life. Coming to terms with my sexuality was quite the journey (and to be honest with you, it still kind of is). Anyways, I go on and on about it, but if you clicked on this then you don’t want to hear about me. 
> 
> and i will try to keep this up (along with the gazillion other fics i have outttt). i was gonna keep this idea wrapped until i finished other fics but i just had to get this out there.   
> but y'all should listen to "IDK You Yet" by Alexander 23, if this doesn't explain this plot (or the half of it in general)
> 
> ALSOOO, just a heads up. Vaughn will be taking the place of 'trig' but him and karolina aren't together. that i will clarify in the story!! I don't condone cheating :) okieee byeeee sorry for the long note :(


End file.
